what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
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