Where did you get a picture of my penis
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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