I got chris browned last night
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
