It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
my being single is dangerous.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
