whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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