Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
This show inspires me to have sex in space
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
