Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
