Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
The Olympian is in my bed
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize
