Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Randomize
