I seem to have left my pride at pride
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
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