that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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