I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
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