last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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