your room smells of hookers.
And success
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
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