wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
