just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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