He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Randomize
