so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
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