Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
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