yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
I enjoy the company of your penis
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
