just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
