Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Randomize
