yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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