he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Randomize
