All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Randomize
