She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
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