I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
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