even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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