I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Randomize
