guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
Randomize
