i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
Randomize
