Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
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