somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
You were trust falling into bushes
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Randomize
