I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Randomize
