All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Randomize
