We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Randomize
