How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize
