Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
