your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize