I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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