is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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