Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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