her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
