She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
