Me too!
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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