I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
