Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Randomize
