I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
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