so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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