drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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