I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
