weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
I use my feet as sexual weapons
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
